Saturday, May 14, 2011

Conversations with God's zealot - This post will change your views on marriage and secure you a good laugh!




The following is an exerpt from a BB conversation I had with a "very very" religious friend today, a very zealous chap indeed. Now let me just say from the onset that I respect people's religious views and quite frankly people's religious views are inconsequential to me, needless to say, from experience most religious people are not very tolerable of my views nor do they extend the same hand of courtesy.

The purpose of this blog is two fold; 1) to demonstrate how idealogies such as religion impede mental development and festers ignorance of a world we are inseparable from. How it misleads the mind to conjure up a false relationship and a false connection from a phyiscal world to that of an alleged spiritual world. 2) And this is probably the MAIN REASON OF ME POSTING is that I totally enjoy riling this person up and this conversation was particularly funny especially the ending LOL hahahaha.

Now before you proceed let me just clarify certain things, I do not subscribe to a life of promiscuity, I'm still searching for that elusive "one", the one where once you meet them, staying faithful will become second nature because that emotional and psychologic bond has been formed between both of you. Do I believe in marriage yes I most definitely do (for it's social and emotional benefits, such as a stable household, and as a societal practice of publicly expressing your love for the person. Contrary to popular belief in ancient Rome love was a stupid reason to get married as the Romans used marriage to form political and financial alliances, hence a woman had no choice in whom she married, was not asked who she loved, she was simply given away by her father like chattel. I beg to strongly differ with the Romans of course because I know for a fact I am an emotional being and 'Love' or that chemical state of mind we refer to as love should be the ONLY REASON TWO PEOPLE GET'S MARRIED, THAT IS MY ABSOLUTE CONVICTION), do I believe it's a God appointed institution? NO and for those of you who want the truth about the history of marriage feel free to enlighten yourselves at the following link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marriage ...here is a little teaser to wet your appetite, some snippets :-) "In Ancient Greece, no specific civil ceremony was required for the creation of a marriage – only mutual agreement and the fact that the couple must regard each other as husband and wife accordingly.

From the early Christian era (30 to 325 CE), marriage was thought of as primarily a private matter,with no uniform religious or other ceremony being required. However, bishop Ignatius of Antioch writing around 110 to bishop Polycarp of Smyrna exhorts, "[I]t becomes both men and women who marry, to form their union with the approval of the bishop, that their marriage may be according to God, and not after their own lust."[21]

In the 12th century women were obligated to take the name of their husbands and starting in the second half of the 16th century parental consent along with the church's consent was required for marriage.[22]

As part of the Protestant Reformation, the role of recording marriages and setting the rules for marriage passed to the state, reflecting Martin Luther's view that marriage was a "worldly thing".[27] By the 17th century many of the Protestant European countries had a state involvement in marriage. As of 2000, the average marriage age range was 25–44 years for men and 22–39 years for women. In England, under the Anglican Church, marriage by consent and cohabitation was valid until the passage of Lord Hardwicke's Act in 1753. This act instituted certain requirements for marriage, including the performance of a religious ceremony observed by witnesses.[28]

As part of the Counter-Reformation, in 1563 the Council of Trent decreed that a Roman Catholic marriage would be recognized only if the marriage ceremony was officiated by a priest with two witnesses. The Council also authorized a Catechism, issued in 1566, which defined marriage as, "The conjugal union of man and woman, contracted between two qualified persons, which obliges them to live together throughout life."[29]


Back to the BB conversation, the origin of the conversation stems from the following BB status which the person had "Trying to live right". Knowing fully well that the status had religious connotations I began my scheme of aggravation and thus the conversation begins.......(grins wickedly) P.S. incase you are wondering about the photo to this blog, that was the photo that was sent to me by the person which led to how the conversation concluded. For the ease of reference the person shall simply be discribed as Hysus to identify what their responses were and I will simply be described as "Me"

And so it begins...



Me: LOL
Me: Always remember what is "right" is always determined by society ergo it is subjective.

Hysus: I don't follow society. I try to live accroding to what the holy bible says. Try to disect and apply and so far the bible has made more sense than my own ideas.

Me: But the bible is a product of society, written by MEN.

Hysus: That's why I said disect and apply and if what it makes sense trying by it.

Me: That's okay once we understand the source of that which you are disecting.

Hysus: The source is written by man but if when disected and applied is found to be right and can only help you be better, then whether written by man through inspiration from God or just man alone, what's right is right. You see God can only reach us through men especially those who try to be difficult! If you seek you will find. Just try that for a change. Its a biblical statement but it has truth if you seek you will find.

Me: "Inspiration"? is a subjective term. People also get inspiration from weed and cocaine. What proof do you have that these men are "inspired" by a God? There is none other that them saying so. What is right is subjective. Long ago it was considered 'right' for a man to beat his wife!

Me: Besides this same bible says do not put your trust in man and seeing that God did not have a personal conversation with me telling me he inspired them then I only have their word.....shall I put my "trust" in them? Whether you call it "faith" the fact is you are putting your trust in a mere imperfect mortal like yourself because you have never heard or seen God personally.

Hysus: You not getting it, I have nothing to prove to you or anyone! I am totally convinced that God is real and my life will always testifies that God is real! Believe what you want to its not my call your choice is your choice. Context is key. To is key to understanding the bible context. Not just a verse or chapter read more more see more. If you really want to know if God exists ask him I am sure he will answer you, I guarantee. Stop fighting God and just talk to him he is there to answer! That I guarantee. But stop thinking that you have to understand everything about God cause you never will.

Me: I beg to differ and unlike you I have no intention of putting any limitations on what I can or cannot understand, to do so would be to live a life of futility. It would also be a complete waste of your grand intellect in which he granted you if in fact he did create you. The human species has made so many advances in science and technology yet a simple thing as understanding a supposed creator or even confirming his existence with actual evidence remains elusive.

Hysus: My beliefv has not one limitation but as I said ask him he will talk to you himself.

Me: I am a physical being and I exist in a physical reality therefore I converse with other physical beings who respond to me. To tell me to just speak to God is a conundrum as God does not exist in my Physical reality...ergo we cannot communicate. That's like trying to light a bulb using plastic string instead of metal wiring...it just ain't going to happen. Contrary to popular belief there is no bridge between the physical and spirit world, hence the reason psychics are considedred frauds along with pastors who's only claim to fame is pocketing people's money!

Hysus: Guess God not ready to open your eyes yet.

Me: He can't speak to me, he does not, nor does he speak to you. Have you ever heard his voice? NO!

Hysus: I said God but pastors are men not perfect. Oh and yes I defintely have heard God. But my walk ain't your walk. Seek and you will find.

Me:Keep telling yourself that until you believe it. There is definition for your claim of 'hearing god'...its called DELUSIONAL.

Hysus: Then I am delusional and have no prob with that. Cause God makes me happy.

Me: The human ears are incapable of hearing anything without a rythmic vibration, and if you can't receive that rythmic vibration then your brain will not register the voice of another. God has no voice with rythmic vibrations because then we would all hear him. So like I said...delusional.

Hysus: And for the first time in my life I can see spiritual things and not fleshly things like everyone else.

Me: Yea Santa Clause also makes children happy....doesn't mean he's real or they can hear him! (roll eye)

Hysus: Oh and the bible says that unless he, meaning God reveals himself to you! You will remain blinded. So I guess God ain't want you to see him yet.

Me: So God the almighty playing peeka boo?....how charming. (roll eye)

Hysus: One day he will open your eyes. I will pray for you in the mean while.

Me: Carry on in your vices...they are inconsequential to me.

Hysus: Don't worry God as A plan for Oke.

Me: In any event question, do you believe the end is near?

Hysus: The end is here

Me: He has a plan for me? Funny enough I thought he granted me free will, if I have free will then I should be able to make my own damn plan. Ah...false advertising as usual! Perhaps God is a conartist!

Hysus: Ok, you just making me laugh yes.

Me: Well if the end is here, Monday morning please liquidate all your worldy investments and give them to me....seing that you won't be needing them!

Hysus: For once I actually stand firm in something I am freely convinced of

Me: I will be coming for my money Monday morning! You keep your convictions I just want the cash! (big grin)

Hysus: Nah that's for my mom, hard luck

Me: (shocked face) But the end is hear! She does not need it...worldy riches will not buy favours with the Lord! (Big grin)

Hysus: You need help yes lol. The more you try to understand God the more confused you will be lol

Me: And what a pity that is, for him to create an entire universe with living beings who are incapable of understanding him.....sad. If man cannot fully understand God as you claim then man could never fully love God because you cannot love that which you do not understand!

THIS IS WHERE THE CONVERSATION GETS REALLY INTERESTING AND FUNNY

Hysus: And you love vagina! Answer that! I guess!

Me: (literally in caps too for full effect for now I had my prey exactly where I wanted him LOL) I UNDERSTAND VAGINA AND ITS PURPOSE, ITS FUNCTIONS AND ITS DESIGNS. HECK I EVEN KNOW HOW THEY TASTE! You mean to tell me YOU don't understand vagina????? (three shocked face smilies) (grins wickedly)

Hysus: That's why vagina giving yuh headache! Cause you ain't understand it but yuh live it though lol. Boy do bible study for tonight lol, you happy yes.

Me: But you can't read or what! I just told you I understand vagina! What gave you the impression vagina is giving me a headache? That's a very liberal assumption

Hysus: Liberal is true and correct get married nah.

Me: You didn't answer me though, do YOU understand vagina?

Hysus: I understand women to an extend that's why I can talk.

Me: Marriage is a man made invention....though I will consider it for its social benefits.

Hysus: You really need help and don't worry God will help you lol

Me: You understand women huh? I wonder if that understanding is the consequence of your many "successful" relationships?

Hysus: You should ask yourself you know more in that area

Me: You don't know the origins of marriage yet you sanctify it....sad...to live such a life of willful ignorance. I never claimed to understand women. I co-exist with other beings and share experiences and idealogies.

Hysus: Don't worry God will help you sir I guarantee it.

Me: But seeing that you want to be condescending and appear as if you have some superior knowledge of the female specie, here is a maxim for you to ponder pon..."Needing someone else to understand is a trap that causes millions of us life long happiness deficit"

Hysus: Ok thanks will keep that in mind. (He then sends the picture of the woman and butterflies in this note with the caption "that is your god, enjoy it") It is at this point I become wild with extacy because he's exactly where I want him to be LOL....I did ponder what is this chaste fellow doing with a picture like that on his phone when I as a sinner and lost soul did not have it! But I did not digress to ask....I wanted to hit him where it hurts...focus focus focus...

Me: Don't be impolite it's not 'Christian like' and reeks of arrogance....definitely not a "Godly trait". I do believe you are suffering from some confusion of your "being" however. That is not my God, that is my essence. For I am a sexual being. Do you know that of all the living creatures on planet earth human beings are the only ones who don't have sex just for procreation? As a matter of fact child rearing is a by product of human sexual encounters rather than its intention. 99% of human sexual encounters are for satisfying pleasure and emotional needs. We have sex just for the pleasure of it, we have no mating season, we have sex when ever, where ever, irrespective of whether the female is ovulating. Perhaps if you took the time to understand your being rather than engaging in spiritual masturbation you would understand life some more! Right now you are an in ideaological grip, you are imprisioned by unsubstantiated beliefs.

Me: LET ME KNOW WHEN YOUR "MATING SEASON" ARRIVES (Grins wickedly) LOL

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Finger Licking Good!!!!

Finger Licking Good!!!!
A moment every Trini could relate to :-)